Thoughts on…
Life Balance
Our “selves” are comprised of four distinct domains, all of which require our care and attention:
physical * mental * emotional * spiritual
Our strengths and deficits direct in part what we’re likely to spend more time, money, and effort on. Some people naturally attend more to their physical selves with a favorite sport or daily exercise routine, or a strong interest in nutrition and healthy cooking. Others nurture the mental self, noticing what they think about and how it affects them. They may enjoy taking or teaching classes, researching topics
of interest and learning, and find themselves frequently in that realm. Some people naturally pay close attention to the way they, or others, are feeling and expressing emotion. They have special ways of taking care of themselves when feeling down or upset, and face head-on what may be at the root of it. The spiritual aspect of ourselves can be found in the universal quest for finding meaning and purpose in life, desire to understand why certain things happen to us or others, and discovering or noticing things that strike awe in us. When a particular area is not a strength, and may even be causing problems in life or relationships, it is time to begin looking at ways to stretch and strengthen awareness
and coping skills, either on your own or with support and guidance. How we set our priorities speaks to that as well. Sometimes we choose our own priorities, and sometimes they come from an outside source, invited or uninvited. In other words, we don’t always have control of what we spend our personal resources on. And when we do, we generally choose what we prefer. It is a true gift to have a choice in setting priorities, as they are what allows us to live and grow in the way we want, deciding what is important and meaningful to attend to. How often do we say, “I wish ____” or “If only ____” (fill in the blank)? Granted, sometimes the best we can do is respond to what is thrown at us and do what must be done. But we do have choices in the way we respond, our attitudes, our perspective on it, the help we garner to better deal with it, and even whether to deal with it or avoid it. Each of these decisions leads to other choices, some better for us, some much worse. The point is: we have the ability to direct what we do with the things that happen to us in ways that make life better for us (and others), and even achieve those blanks you filled in up above.
Though “balance” is an oft-mentioned concept, we tend to focus more on one realm of ourselves than others at any given time. Our focus shifts with our current status and needs, whether in our psyche (internally) or in our lives (externally). There are times in life when it feels like we’re hanging on by the fingernails to make it through. At those times, you will likely and necessarily be attending to the domain called for while minimizing others. Things like a flare-up of a chronic illness or an injury, a move or job change, relationship difficulties, or a death of a friend cause us to dwell in a particular arena, as we focus on healing or getting through a certain situation.
Once homeostasis is regained, finding ways to nurture ourselves and take care of our physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual selves help us live our healthiest and best overall lives. There is strong overlap within and among these parts of us, such that when one domain is well, other parts are stronger too, and better able to manage and even thrive in life’s transitions and uncertainties. For example, boosting our mental and emotional fitness has very real impact on physical
well-being. Everything within us is connected… and matters.